Intellectually Intact

As part of the RTF process, Hope needed a psychological done. We did the IQ test today. As expected, Hope is intellectually intact. I am happy that there is something else I can cross off my check list. But my initial reaction was blinding anger.


How did her first adoptive family take an intact baby and turn her into the feral five year old we adopted. Not productive, I know. But my anger is real.

10 thoughts on “Intellectually Intact

  1. It’s justified. Even when my kids were deemed low and lower IQ, I still felt that blinding anger. WHY, WHY, WHY is all I could say. When my rational brain takes over, I get the whys. I don’t ever think I’ll get the how’s though. HOW could someone do hat do a kid? HOW could someone do this to themselves?

  2. I can imagine your anger. It’s deserved. Does she have language difficulties? Makes me wonder if they ever even talked to her. I’m an SLP and am so happy she has a good IQ, but it is infuriating!

  3. It is real. I met that little girl, and just in the time I spent with her I completely fell in love with her, and I have more anger for the Texas Parents than I know what to do with. I have been listening to your story for years, and I always had anger towards them– but now– I found that anger so overwhelming it is the first thing I discussed with my therapist this week. I do not always know how to keep getting up every morning knowing that that much hurt exists in the world, and I don’t know how you keep getting up knowing what they did to her, and how THAT affects everyone else in your life, including GB. You are all in my thoughts and prayers constantly. If I could figure out what to do with her while I worked I would offer to come and get Hope tomorrow. I love you all, and am praying for help and peace for all of you. ❤ ❤ ❤

  4. Thinking what Tanie said, I wonder if Hope does rage because she cannot express her feelings.
    Because more often than not, children understand more than they can express.

    Could it help if you could provide her a system to express her emotions by pictures ?

    I can only understand your anger for Texas family.

  5. Your anger is understandable and justified. We found out recently our kid has severely limited receptive and expressive language, which regardless of intellect can contribute to rages. But clearly there’s deep, deep hurt that your daughter experienced in her birth family that altered her neurological wiring – and I, too, am angry on her behalf.

  6. Intellectually intact is a huge plus. You can’t turn back the clock and rescue Hope from her first adoptive family but you can help Hope build on her strengths. She may never be cuddly, compliant and “fun to be with,” as they say in AT-speak but she can have a successful life.

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