Hope immediately took to her new Daddy. She wants him constantly and only feels safe when she is within touching distance of him.
Hope’s instinctive response to a perceived threat is to hit, bite or scratch. It took GB about 48 hours to decide the best defense is an offense. She has now taken to scaring Hope with verbal stories (there is a wolf in the back yard) to keep Hope away from her. Whispering is no longer allowed and now both of them have to be in direct site at all times.
I am still the mean, ugly mommy. There have been a couple of times where she has come near me and even let me hug her, but only when she is not angry or afraid.
I did my first official attachment activity today- I fed her little pieces of birthday cake while maintaining eye contact. GB’s/Hope’s Dad has done a lot more with her, but it much easier to work on attachment with a little girl who sweetly calls you Daddy and bats her eyes at you.
The Dad and I have spoken about the need for consistent responses to both girls and are working on unified expectations.
So far we have managed to not be triangulated. I know it is just a matter of time before we slip.
The Dad goes back to work tomorrow. It will just be the three of us and the real work will begin. I have 9 days before school starts and an awful lot on my list.
I am really glad I am not a single parent. I don’t know how they do it.